Changing One Thing Changes Everything
This time of year I review the past year. I consider the people I have met, the new friends, the steady old friends, the friends that have gone, the casual acquaintances, the people I wanted to build friendships with but didn't, (for whatever reason), the ones that moved away, and most of all what they have brought to my life.
Every decision has consequences, and I consider those before I make the decision. I have looked at the price to be paid, and made the choice. Taking full responsibility for my part in the outcome. I do not regret anything. Not one thing. Nothing I have said I regret. I meant it all. Did I hurt some..... yah I know I did. My intentions were not to hurt, but as hard as I try, even when I feel like I am letting them down softy..... it is still harsh.
Decisions are linked together by a thread.... one leads to another. Looking at where I am today... it is through a series of decisions. I like who I am. I like the tender part of my heart that makes me cry with this deep, deep appreciation for those who have fought and served this country. I can not even say "thank you" without the tears. I have not lost a loved one through service, nor do I have any family in service, I just know where I have been and lived and the patriotism of the USA is incredible. I know they are giving all..... I know I would have served would they have taken me.
Now I am sure that would have changed my destination in life completely. I'm not sure that it would have been a good idea anyhow, but at the time I wanted in, my smart mouth would have kept me in trouble, if not landed me in jail. I can listen to and follow authority figures in my life, if they have earned my respect. Cause Rank is something you wear.... but my respect... that is something you will have to earn. I can not be "handled".... unless I choose to listen.. LOL
I like the strong, staunch, vehement part of my personality. That is the major dominant part of Marie who is present 98% of the time. This is where the tough decisions are made, like leaving Canada and moving to the USA with only 2 suitcases. Walking away from everything, and never going back.
I would have to say that the biggest change that has happened in the last 11 years since moving here, is that I put myself out there more, subjecting myself to more critique. My photography business requires me to be accessible to people. They want to know who they are dealing with, and know a little about me. . I like going to church on my bike.....I ride, and I love to ride, and I want to cut through the crap right off the bat.... cause if you cant take me at my worst, you don't get me at my best !!!The secretive, private Marie that lived in Canada stayed there..... Marie that is here will tell you what she wants you to know.... and doesn't care who knows what. Cause if you don't like it too F@#$ bad! go away! LOL I own the "Delete button".
I have no regrets....
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